Them Damn Cats! Part II

Our betters in North Waterford are at it again, having a good ol’ chuckle at our expense after last Sunday’s win. Some wag over at KilkennyCats.com had this to say:

Waterford Celebration Guide Book

1. Beat 19 point Leinster runner up by one point and begin fist pumping
2. If spectator, shake hands with every opposition supporter around you that you have roared torrents of abuse at for last hour and a half and run onto field as though you have won the All Ireland.
3. If manager, kiss ground ala Papal visit and explain to reporters how the coup of the century came to pass.
4. If player, seek out every photographer from every newspaper from The Irish Times to the Summer Bay Gazette to ensure maximum publicity of jersey kissing and afore mentioned fist pumping. (As with supporters, this should be done with as much enthusiasm as though one has won the All Ireland).
5. If player with no children, run to crowd (extra fist pumping and jersey kissing required here) and throw said jersey to supporters ala Maradona post Boca Juniors Cup Final victory.
6. If player with children, meet at pre arranged location and repeat step 4
7. If player, speak to Sunday Game correspondant explaining how big a victory the game was (again as though one has one an All Ireland), while describing beaten opposition as a serious outfit even though your supporters spend tweleve months of the year describing Leinster hurling as Rionn B standard.
8. If you have scored, describe to reporter how you knew you had it in you and it was just a matter of time before it came out.
9. If player, assume God like status in home town for 3 weeks.
10. Proceed to annual drubbing in semi final.

One could fisk this endlessly – when, for example, have we ever taken a ‘drubbing’ in a semi-final? But, objectively speaking, it’s funny and there’s a lot of truth in it. Hopefully we’ll get the opportunity to make Walter Sobchak of Fatima Mansions regret his wit.

(Hat tip to chippercunningham over at UpTheDeise.com for bringing this to a wider audience.)

Advertisements